The Question is all there.
:)From whom did Heather mills recently seek advice, according to The Spanner, regarding her divorce?
not sure but you can see her doing a naked video before her divorce,
if the spanner havent seen this video then send it to them.
http://jammydodger.net
Click categories then go celebrities
Friday, April 30, 2010
I need some advice on divorce in two states CT and PA?
My girlfriend is trying to get divorced so she can retain full custody of her child and I need some advice on how and what to do and if anyone knows a good lawyer, we are short on cash and need help. He is abusive and controlling and he has put out threats to me and my girlfriend and he has had a restraining order but it just lifted. PLEASE PLEASE we need help. I want this to happen so that I can adopt her and we can be a family and not have this to deal with on a day to day basis. Also he stalks her and that's why she ran away from him with her child. If you can help that would be appreciated. Thank youI need some advice on divorce in two states CT and PA?
In order for you to adopt her child you usually need the biological father to sign over his parental rights. Since he's abusive, its not likely that he will. If you cannot afford a lawyer, contact legal aid and ask how this parental rights can be waived, I have heard of it in some cases such as yours.
No one wants to leave a child in the custody of, or around an abusive person. I do believe there are ways to waive him signing over his rights and allow you to adopt, however most states require you two to be married first.I need some advice on divorce in two states CT and PA?
Go on these websites
http://www.nolo.com/article.cfm/ObjectID/796DE8B4-2417-4175-80714E5DCCE20C75/
http://www.agoodlawyer.com/
http://www.smith-lawfirm.com/medCBA.html
http://articles.directorym.com/Divorce_Connecticut-r1036-Connecticut.html
Which state are you in? Can you get another restraining order? Try researching 'legal aid' and see what you can find. States usually have a law clinic. You definitely need a lawyer on this one. Please tell me what state you are in and I could help look for you.
In PA, child custody is never ';settled.'; IOW, either party can always ask the court to reconsider the matter.
The children and youth services center in PA can help with the rest. I don't know about CT.
CT %26amp; PA? 2 states? That's illegal!rosacea treatment
In order for you to adopt her child you usually need the biological father to sign over his parental rights. Since he's abusive, its not likely that he will. If you cannot afford a lawyer, contact legal aid and ask how this parental rights can be waived, I have heard of it in some cases such as yours.
No one wants to leave a child in the custody of, or around an abusive person. I do believe there are ways to waive him signing over his rights and allow you to adopt, however most states require you two to be married first.I need some advice on divorce in two states CT and PA?
Go on these websites
http://www.nolo.com/article.cfm/ObjectID/796DE8B4-2417-4175-80714E5DCCE20C75/
http://www.agoodlawyer.com/
http://www.smith-lawfirm.com/medCBA.html
http://articles.directorym.com/Divorce_Connecticut-r1036-Connecticut.html
Which state are you in? Can you get another restraining order? Try researching 'legal aid' and see what you can find. States usually have a law clinic. You definitely need a lawyer on this one. Please tell me what state you are in and I could help look for you.
In PA, child custody is never ';settled.'; IOW, either party can always ask the court to reconsider the matter.
The children and youth services center in PA can help with the rest. I don't know about CT.
CT %26amp; PA? 2 states? That's illegal!
I need some Advice (((A DIVORCE LAWYER WOULD BE NICE)))?
I need some Advice from a divorce lawyer... My husband of 11 years, but I have been with him for 17 is coming into some money in a law suite from Work men's Compensation Aug 25Th he should know how much he will get... I want to get a divorce from him because he JUST cheated on me and over the 17 yrs has cheated many times... He said if I go file now he will not give me anything, but if I stay he will give me what he feels he should... He said he got hurt not me and I should be lucky to get what he gives me... My question I guess is how do I go about getting some of it? I THINK I should get half of it (right) when he gets the check it's in his name... I will not even no when he gets it... So what can I do?? I know I'm saying this all wrong I have not slept in 4 day's and this is driving me insane... ~~~I need HELP~~~I need some Advice (((A DIVORCE LAWYER WOULD BE NICE)))?
The judgment has been officially signed? If you're entitled to any of the money, it might not matter that it is not yet in hand. In other words, filing now might not save him from having to give you anything. In fact it might be better so that you establish your claim NOW. You really should make an appointment with a divorce attorney. In fact, get an initial consultation with some of the best ones around. Even though you will only hire one, the ones who have given you a free consultation ethically can't represent HIM if he goes to them after you do.
Don't forget, since your marriage lasted at least 10 years, you may be eligible for some of your husband's Social Security benefits one day.I need some Advice (((A DIVORCE LAWYER WOULD BE NICE)))?
%26lt;check with a lawyer licensed in your area%26gt;
The STRICT rule is that - in the event of a divorce - he would get the portion of award that is pain and suffering and future medical bills, and YOU would get a portion (presumptively 1/2) of the ';lost wages'; component.
The problem is that the award is almost never broken down this way. It is almost always just $xx,xxx and you have to argue tohis lawyer or the judge how much you should get.
You are entitled to your community property portion of the pay off. It may not be 1/2 but you have an interest in it. File for divorce and file a motion with the court requesting the pay off be frozen and placed into a trust account until such time as your interest in the same is decided.
You should hire an attorney for this one.
Your right to part of the settlement depends on the state in which you live. It will not matter if you file now or later since the final divorce settlement will take months to complete anyway. If you file now, your attorney can draft a separation agreement that will help protect your financial interests until your divorce is final. Good luck. No one deserves to live with a cheater - no matter how much $$$ is involved.
I think most state divorce law would split the assets of a divorcing couple in half. You will have to consult with a divorce attorney anyway. You definitely will want to protect your rights when you do start divorce proceedings.
You have probably been freeloading?? Try getting a job and support yourself.
I'm not a divorce lawyer, and I have an idea that people who get paid hundreds of dollars to do something don't turn around and do it for free, hon.
He got hurt not you, so it is his money. While you are married to him, what is his is yours, but if you divorce him, none of that money is yours.
If you're in a situation like you've been supporting him for years on your income because he's disabled, then you might have a case, but probably not.
If you want the money, you've got to stay married to him, so decide if it's worth it to you.
The judgment has been officially signed? If you're entitled to any of the money, it might not matter that it is not yet in hand. In other words, filing now might not save him from having to give you anything. In fact it might be better so that you establish your claim NOW. You really should make an appointment with a divorce attorney. In fact, get an initial consultation with some of the best ones around. Even though you will only hire one, the ones who have given you a free consultation ethically can't represent HIM if he goes to them after you do.
Don't forget, since your marriage lasted at least 10 years, you may be eligible for some of your husband's Social Security benefits one day.I need some Advice (((A DIVORCE LAWYER WOULD BE NICE)))?
%26lt;check with a lawyer licensed in your area%26gt;
The STRICT rule is that - in the event of a divorce - he would get the portion of award that is pain and suffering and future medical bills, and YOU would get a portion (presumptively 1/2) of the ';lost wages'; component.
The problem is that the award is almost never broken down this way. It is almost always just $xx,xxx and you have to argue tohis lawyer or the judge how much you should get.
You are entitled to your community property portion of the pay off. It may not be 1/2 but you have an interest in it. File for divorce and file a motion with the court requesting the pay off be frozen and placed into a trust account until such time as your interest in the same is decided.
You should hire an attorney for this one.
Your right to part of the settlement depends on the state in which you live. It will not matter if you file now or later since the final divorce settlement will take months to complete anyway. If you file now, your attorney can draft a separation agreement that will help protect your financial interests until your divorce is final. Good luck. No one deserves to live with a cheater - no matter how much $$$ is involved.
I think most state divorce law would split the assets of a divorcing couple in half. You will have to consult with a divorce attorney anyway. You definitely will want to protect your rights when you do start divorce proceedings.
You have probably been freeloading?? Try getting a job and support yourself.
I'm not a divorce lawyer, and I have an idea that people who get paid hundreds of dollars to do something don't turn around and do it for free, hon.
He got hurt not you, so it is his money. While you are married to him, what is his is yours, but if you divorce him, none of that money is yours.
If you're in a situation like you've been supporting him for years on your income because he's disabled, then you might have a case, but probably not.
If you want the money, you've got to stay married to him, so decide if it's worth it to you.
For those who give advice on ';marriage and Divorce';. Do you give advice that will get you the ';best answer'; or
Or do you give the advice that the person needs to hear? Lately, I've noticed that my answers are in no way going to get me the ';best answer'; because those answers need some tough logical esteem spanking content.
What factors do you keep in mind when giving the best advice you can give? Do you tickle their ears, or burn them with rebuke?For those who give advice on ';marriage and Divorce';. Do you give advice that will get you the ';best answer'; or
I never tell a partner to leave unless that is the question. As in: ';How do I leave?';
I try to address the issue at hand, and encourage friendship and respect in the relationship.
Also, if the resolving the issue actually is the asker's responsibility, then I say so.For those who give advice on ';marriage and Divorce';. Do you give advice that will get you the ';best answer'; or
Yeah, I think it's because there are a lot of young and immature kids in this forum, they are really playing a game for points with silly and stupid answers. i reckon they should have a forum for the over 40's.
I give them the best advice I can based on my knowledge and experience.
I feel that people (usually) post serious questions here, and have (usually) real problems they need help with. If I answered looking for a best, it would be a waste of their time and mine.
Good question, by the way.
when I answer a question either I provide information I've read, researched, and know to be true, or from other peoples' experiences, or I provide information from my own experiences, and I let the reader decide which is best for them (only they know). Whether or not the reader feels the answer is focused and direct is their own opinion. ';I'; feel the answer is focused, direct and from experience. If they ask for a specific answer, i.e. ';where can I buy this or that';...I'll give them a place where they can buy it. I don't answer all questions that arrive in my email. 99% of the time I choose questions that I do know the answer to.
I ONLY go to this when I feel like seeing if someone else has or is in the same situation as I am or have been, usually my answers are related to personal experiances and are usually reflected in my answers. I actually read one of yours a few minutes ago, thought it was quite blunt yet to the point, some of the questions AND answers her are quite ridiculous, and sometimes are coming from obviously immature people in addition, answers are sometimes quite rude and critical, to the point that these people regardless or age/situation are in fact asking for advise but I sometimes, actually quite often see alot of snotty comments, I've only asked 2 questions and got a short but snotty answer from someone who apparently does not read well. But then again, some of these questions, while partially anonymous, I think are uncalled for on such a public forum.
that is not my primary goal. i try to give help by sharing what think is right by using some of my own experiences.
I'm only on here to be a smart ***. People must like it because they give me 10 points with lots of ';lols.';
I call it like I see it, and if the person likes it, great, and if not, then maybe it gives them something new to consider.
Fair question - it comes down to motives, I suppose.
I think the motive for initially asking the question is because someone is hurting.
I'd like to think this forum can offer wisdom and perspective and actually help people on some level; even if it's just support.
Ultimately, all most all of my answers remind that a relationship is the responsibility of both, so placing the burden back on the asker is common.
I hope that makes sense!
I try to use a little tact and/or humor. First off about 75% of the questions out here are complete crap. People pretending to be something that they aren't. I don't bother to answer questions that make me think that. But when I do get a question I want to answer, I try to place myself into the situation or see if I have known someone in that type of situation. I give the best answer I can. What they do with it after that is their choice. Don't tell em what they want to hear, tell them what you believe they need to hear.
I tell them how I see their situation standing from the outside. Often I've been in their situation and I can share how I've handled it, if it was successful or not etc.
I am not a professional in dispensing advice but I read through the questions and I answer based on common sense and sometimes instincts.
Tough and long questions are not for me, so I go for the keywords in them.
Sometimes, it takes someone else to read through something so complicated to get the asker to see the real situation.
Tickle or burn, I just hope my answers do not do more harm.
I try to give my honest opinion about any given situation based upon the information that is given. I try to answer by giving my advice on how I would react to certain situations...but it is so easy to be the one giving the advise if you are not the one in the situation. I think we can predict how we would handle a situation....but I really think that when our emotions take over....we will react based upon those emotions and not necessarily on common sense. As far as getting the best answer..No I am not looking for that...I couldn't care less...I just want to offer support and any insight that I can for others.
i give answers based on my experiences and trying to save the 'asker' from even more heartbreak. i believe that when someone is hurt it's so hard to sort things out. that's why we're here to present to them the other side of the coin and not be biased about things.
I think of how I would handle the problem. Sometimes I can relate to the question because I've been there, sometimes not. Although I try not to do it, there are times when I get a little annoyed by people's stupidity that I might not give as level headed an answer as I normally would. I get a little irked when people list off the problems in their relationship and it's a huge laundry list of things that should have kept them out of the relationship in the first place. I shake my head at many questions on here, not only in this section but others as well.
answer the best i can based on my interpretation of the question posted.
its not about the points.
I tend only to tell them how I would deal with it if I were in the situation and what I know to be true having/going through a divorce not to get me the ';best answer'; I don't care about that b/c I still get 2 points just for answering :-)
based on my past experiences and my lifes worth of learning, i tell them the truth the best i can. i could care less about points, i care about ppl. and when i tell them the truth if they get mad at what i said, then they really prolly didn't want an answer anyway.
one example a week or two back that comes 2 mind was a gal who said she divorced her hubby a year ago, he immediately remarried, she was still sleeping with him behind his wifes back and she doesn't know what 2 do now b'cause he told her if she tells his wife he'll file 4 custody of their children...she wanted advice on what 2 do...she should have asked 4 that advice before she kept sleeping with a newly married man weather he was her ex or not, or she already knew the consequences...believe me if she really doesn't know what to do in that case herself, no one on here can help her. i was really tempted 2 answer her by asking her age and iq.
most of the ppl here asking questions want real answers and they get the best i have when i answer. the rest of the ppl just need a poke in the head b'cause in their question they list they have already answered if for themselves and don't need anyone elses advice.
I usually only answer questions that I think I can make a contribution too. I have 37 years of marriage experience and Hopefully I have learned some things that might help others. Points don't really matter to me.
What's an esteem spanking?
I just give my own honest person opinion, whether from personal experience or someone I know going/went through same thing...
I can be very blunt. I always give answers and advice that I think the person needs to hear. I'm not in any competition.
Receiving a best answer is always appreciated, but I never make that my goal when answering. I answer as honestly and truthfully with the intention of assisting another. I do not try to be cute or clever and my answers come from my heart and experiences in life. If any answer helps a person get through a rough time, that is all the award I need.
My advice is just that, my advice. This is what I'd do in that situation. If I get the best answer, that's great, but not what I'm shooting for.
What factors do you keep in mind when giving the best advice you can give? Do you tickle their ears, or burn them with rebuke?For those who give advice on ';marriage and Divorce';. Do you give advice that will get you the ';best answer'; or
I never tell a partner to leave unless that is the question. As in: ';How do I leave?';
I try to address the issue at hand, and encourage friendship and respect in the relationship.
Also, if the resolving the issue actually is the asker's responsibility, then I say so.For those who give advice on ';marriage and Divorce';. Do you give advice that will get you the ';best answer'; or
Yeah, I think it's because there are a lot of young and immature kids in this forum, they are really playing a game for points with silly and stupid answers. i reckon they should have a forum for the over 40's.
I give them the best advice I can based on my knowledge and experience.
I feel that people (usually) post serious questions here, and have (usually) real problems they need help with. If I answered looking for a best, it would be a waste of their time and mine.
Good question, by the way.
when I answer a question either I provide information I've read, researched, and know to be true, or from other peoples' experiences, or I provide information from my own experiences, and I let the reader decide which is best for them (only they know). Whether or not the reader feels the answer is focused and direct is their own opinion. ';I'; feel the answer is focused, direct and from experience. If they ask for a specific answer, i.e. ';where can I buy this or that';...I'll give them a place where they can buy it. I don't answer all questions that arrive in my email. 99% of the time I choose questions that I do know the answer to.
I ONLY go to this when I feel like seeing if someone else has or is in the same situation as I am or have been, usually my answers are related to personal experiances and are usually reflected in my answers. I actually read one of yours a few minutes ago, thought it was quite blunt yet to the point, some of the questions AND answers her are quite ridiculous, and sometimes are coming from obviously immature people in addition, answers are sometimes quite rude and critical, to the point that these people regardless or age/situation are in fact asking for advise but I sometimes, actually quite often see alot of snotty comments, I've only asked 2 questions and got a short but snotty answer from someone who apparently does not read well. But then again, some of these questions, while partially anonymous, I think are uncalled for on such a public forum.
that is not my primary goal. i try to give help by sharing what think is right by using some of my own experiences.
I'm only on here to be a smart ***. People must like it because they give me 10 points with lots of ';lols.';
I call it like I see it, and if the person likes it, great, and if not, then maybe it gives them something new to consider.
Fair question - it comes down to motives, I suppose.
I think the motive for initially asking the question is because someone is hurting.
I'd like to think this forum can offer wisdom and perspective and actually help people on some level; even if it's just support.
Ultimately, all most all of my answers remind that a relationship is the responsibility of both, so placing the burden back on the asker is common.
I hope that makes sense!
I try to use a little tact and/or humor. First off about 75% of the questions out here are complete crap. People pretending to be something that they aren't. I don't bother to answer questions that make me think that. But when I do get a question I want to answer, I try to place myself into the situation or see if I have known someone in that type of situation. I give the best answer I can. What they do with it after that is their choice. Don't tell em what they want to hear, tell them what you believe they need to hear.
I tell them how I see their situation standing from the outside. Often I've been in their situation and I can share how I've handled it, if it was successful or not etc.
I am not a professional in dispensing advice but I read through the questions and I answer based on common sense and sometimes instincts.
Tough and long questions are not for me, so I go for the keywords in them.
Sometimes, it takes someone else to read through something so complicated to get the asker to see the real situation.
Tickle or burn, I just hope my answers do not do more harm.
I try to give my honest opinion about any given situation based upon the information that is given. I try to answer by giving my advice on how I would react to certain situations...but it is so easy to be the one giving the advise if you are not the one in the situation. I think we can predict how we would handle a situation....but I really think that when our emotions take over....we will react based upon those emotions and not necessarily on common sense. As far as getting the best answer..No I am not looking for that...I couldn't care less...I just want to offer support and any insight that I can for others.
i give answers based on my experiences and trying to save the 'asker' from even more heartbreak. i believe that when someone is hurt it's so hard to sort things out. that's why we're here to present to them the other side of the coin and not be biased about things.
I think of how I would handle the problem. Sometimes I can relate to the question because I've been there, sometimes not. Although I try not to do it, there are times when I get a little annoyed by people's stupidity that I might not give as level headed an answer as I normally would. I get a little irked when people list off the problems in their relationship and it's a huge laundry list of things that should have kept them out of the relationship in the first place. I shake my head at many questions on here, not only in this section but others as well.
answer the best i can based on my interpretation of the question posted.
its not about the points.
I tend only to tell them how I would deal with it if I were in the situation and what I know to be true having/going through a divorce not to get me the ';best answer'; I don't care about that b/c I still get 2 points just for answering :-)
based on my past experiences and my lifes worth of learning, i tell them the truth the best i can. i could care less about points, i care about ppl. and when i tell them the truth if they get mad at what i said, then they really prolly didn't want an answer anyway.
one example a week or two back that comes 2 mind was a gal who said she divorced her hubby a year ago, he immediately remarried, she was still sleeping with him behind his wifes back and she doesn't know what 2 do now b'cause he told her if she tells his wife he'll file 4 custody of their children...she wanted advice on what 2 do...she should have asked 4 that advice before she kept sleeping with a newly married man weather he was her ex or not, or she already knew the consequences...believe me if she really doesn't know what to do in that case herself, no one on here can help her. i was really tempted 2 answer her by asking her age and iq.
most of the ppl here asking questions want real answers and they get the best i have when i answer. the rest of the ppl just need a poke in the head b'cause in their question they list they have already answered if for themselves and don't need anyone elses advice.
I usually only answer questions that I think I can make a contribution too. I have 37 years of marriage experience and Hopefully I have learned some things that might help others. Points don't really matter to me.
What's an esteem spanking?
I just give my own honest person opinion, whether from personal experience or someone I know going/went through same thing...
I can be very blunt. I always give answers and advice that I think the person needs to hear. I'm not in any competition.
Receiving a best answer is always appreciated, but I never make that my goal when answering. I answer as honestly and truthfully with the intention of assisting another. I do not try to be cute or clever and my answers come from my heart and experiences in life. If any answer helps a person get through a rough time, that is all the award I need.
My advice is just that, my advice. This is what I'd do in that situation. If I get the best answer, that's great, but not what I'm shooting for.
I need advice regarding divorce?
Been married for 25 months, previously have known husband for 7 yrs.He's dominant and too controlling.Ever since we've started dating we broke up many times but he would always come back CRYING to me and would make me feel guilty.He's well aware i can't see people crying as i had a rough childhood....He shows no sign of reconciliation coz he told me once that if i seek for divorce i'll be damaged goods, true??Schysophrenia runs in his family. Said he won't participate in the divorce, can i still get a divorce, please help........I need advice regarding divorce?
This is verbal abuse, crying for you to take him back and saying you are damaged goods. Is he hitting you, too? I'd get away from him and tell him to see a mental health professional. He can't dominate you if you don't let him. You might to try to find a battered woman's program and see if they have something that can help you. You don't have to be hit to be abused.
You can see a lawyer and get your questions answered. Even if the divorce takes longer, you can live independently and get strong and support yourself. Do not get involved with any other man until you get some counseling to see why you settled for this.
We women want to be wanted and to help other people. I think you fell for it in a big way. You can't help him. Let him cry.I need advice regarding divorce?
Just out of curiosity, if you knew for 7 years that he was a lunatic, why on earth did you marry him???
But never mind, of course you can still get a divorce even without his cooperation, it just might take a little longer. Consult a lawyer.
its your right to divorce him, he doesn't need to be involved and protect his assets if he chooses not to.
you have the right to do what is good for you. do not confuse your childhood with this manipulating piece of trash. file for divorce, kick him out, change your number and warn him that if he comes close to you or calls you, you will call the police. end it. you have wasted alot of your life on a lying scumbag who cries crockodile trears. you have the law on your side and i'm sure alot of friends so do it.
Hire an Attorney and yes, you can be totally divorced even if he doesn't sign. The Judge will grant it to you, don't worry about it.
And please don't allow any more abuse from this complete man less, manipulative, coward, assh--e, have some decency yourself and dignity and show him you have bigger balls than his.
You need to grow according to your experiences and move forward......don't park in the abuse zone or go backwards....a true woman never does this!
no, he is trying to manipulate you. it is abusive guy 101.
if you walk away from him, you will be the opposite of damaged goods, you will be someone who is unwilling to tolerate being disrespected.
dn't divorce yet.
A divorce is a last resort. You really need to sit down with your husband and talk this whole thing over rationally. You need to take the time and sit and discuss everything, every little thing, express your feeling, tell him how you feel, try counseling, there are ways to deal with this other then divorce, that is just the easy way out.
get a lawyer. He is playing you with the crying thing because he knows you will take him back each time. He needs to grow up and you need to get out.
Yes, you can definitely get a divorce. And I'd bet he wouldn't contest it once it was in the works. So often a guy like that is much more talk than action - once you start the legal process he very well might go along with it. And if he doesn't - you'll still be able to attain a divorce. Nobody - repeat - NOBODY can force you to stay legally married against your will. Of course, don't try and do this without an attorney. They've seen it all - trust me - and so they'll know how to deal with your husband's reluctance, as well as the history of emotional abuse - AND his mental health problems.
Good luck, and be tough. You've got that in you or you wouldn't be asking this question. Unfortunately, you have to do almost all of this on your own....so be strong.
Disregard the emotional attacks from his family, friends, and him - and KNOW that those will pass with time - I swear they will. Take comfort in people you trust 100% - and even those people may change as you go through this process. Listen to your heart. Sounds like it's saying ';go, girl.';
Trust me, I've been there.
You can get a divorce without his consent. However, are you sure you really want a divorce? That is all up to you. Maybe you are just very angry right now... Give it more thought.
Also, even if his family has Schizophrenia, that does not mean anything! Atleast to me it means nothing, so they are all crazy. Now if you would have said he is he schizophrenic, which would be a different story.
Damage goods comment was him saying ';oh my god, don鈥檛 leave me I will be the messed up one.'; People tend to express how they feel or will feel on to others, to get it off their chest.
Consider if what he ';does to you'; is really on purpose or as bad as you are believing it to be, or is it you exaggerating.
On a lighter tone, you married a man that cries? Ha-ha, that should have been a clue to not marry -- Just kidding.
You should actually consider if this man makes you feel good 80% of the time you are with him, or if he makes you feel miserable. I say 80% because it is impossible to avoid conflicts between peoples. If you do feel he is just messing your happiness up, then divorce might be the solution.
Sounds complicated. But yes, you can still get a divorce. Talk to a lawyer. Damaged goods? Please. No you will not be damaged goods. You're right, he is controlling. Manipulative too.
Yes you can still get a divorce if he isn't wanting it. It will take alittle longer and you will need to be stronger and not let his cry baby attitude suck up back and stop the divorce process.
And think about this you being damaged goods is his fault you are damaged because of him and his problems. But you are not damaged because of it.
it will take longer but yes you can
good luck
going through the same thing
well if your not comfortable with the way he acts somtimes, then you need to confront him. Tell him how you think he can be a bit controlling, and that you think you two should make decisions together, seeing how your married now. If you married the guy, then there has to be somthing there, I wouldn't get a divorce just yet, talk to him first, and let him know how serious you are about your relationship together. And if a man comes back crying, then you know he has somes serious feelings for you. give him another chance. You don't want to make a choice about a divorce, you havn't gave him time yet, just talk to him.
what state?
All the 50 states have different rules so it is important that you see what it will take you get you divorced.
Look in your phone book or on line and try to see what attorneys will offer you a free consultation to get an idea of what you have in store
but to answer your question, YES you can be divorced without his help but it will be a tad more difficult.
P.s. If you are such damaged goods, why does he keep coming back (maybe to do more damage to you?)
Of course you can get a divorce. He doesn't have to consent. First, move very far away from this guy. Don't let him know where you are, and don't be in any hurry to hook up with another guy.
Work on yourself first so you don't repeat this pattern.
You should have never married him in the first place BUT having said that, you can divorce him. He is playing you for a fool since you already know you have trouble with him crying. Damaged goods???? Then that is 90% of the population since most of us out here are divorced and I don't think you could find 1% of the people older than 21 that are still virgins anyway. Who cares? Damaged goods is an old saying when the culture said you were supposed to marry a virgin. You can't even find one hardly anymore. That is were society has fallen to. Don't worry about it. There are plenty of guys out there that will treat you right. Ditch this loser quickly!!!
Sure, anyone can. It's sad, but divorce is common and very easy to obtain in this day and age we live in.
This is verbal abuse, crying for you to take him back and saying you are damaged goods. Is he hitting you, too? I'd get away from him and tell him to see a mental health professional. He can't dominate you if you don't let him. You might to try to find a battered woman's program and see if they have something that can help you. You don't have to be hit to be abused.
You can see a lawyer and get your questions answered. Even if the divorce takes longer, you can live independently and get strong and support yourself. Do not get involved with any other man until you get some counseling to see why you settled for this.
We women want to be wanted and to help other people. I think you fell for it in a big way. You can't help him. Let him cry.I need advice regarding divorce?
Just out of curiosity, if you knew for 7 years that he was a lunatic, why on earth did you marry him???
But never mind, of course you can still get a divorce even without his cooperation, it just might take a little longer. Consult a lawyer.
its your right to divorce him, he doesn't need to be involved and protect his assets if he chooses not to.
you have the right to do what is good for you. do not confuse your childhood with this manipulating piece of trash. file for divorce, kick him out, change your number and warn him that if he comes close to you or calls you, you will call the police. end it. you have wasted alot of your life on a lying scumbag who cries crockodile trears. you have the law on your side and i'm sure alot of friends so do it.
Hire an Attorney and yes, you can be totally divorced even if he doesn't sign. The Judge will grant it to you, don't worry about it.
And please don't allow any more abuse from this complete man less, manipulative, coward, assh--e, have some decency yourself and dignity and show him you have bigger balls than his.
You need to grow according to your experiences and move forward......don't park in the abuse zone or go backwards....a true woman never does this!
no, he is trying to manipulate you. it is abusive guy 101.
if you walk away from him, you will be the opposite of damaged goods, you will be someone who is unwilling to tolerate being disrespected.
dn't divorce yet.
A divorce is a last resort. You really need to sit down with your husband and talk this whole thing over rationally. You need to take the time and sit and discuss everything, every little thing, express your feeling, tell him how you feel, try counseling, there are ways to deal with this other then divorce, that is just the easy way out.
get a lawyer. He is playing you with the crying thing because he knows you will take him back each time. He needs to grow up and you need to get out.
Yes, you can definitely get a divorce. And I'd bet he wouldn't contest it once it was in the works. So often a guy like that is much more talk than action - once you start the legal process he very well might go along with it. And if he doesn't - you'll still be able to attain a divorce. Nobody - repeat - NOBODY can force you to stay legally married against your will. Of course, don't try and do this without an attorney. They've seen it all - trust me - and so they'll know how to deal with your husband's reluctance, as well as the history of emotional abuse - AND his mental health problems.
Good luck, and be tough. You've got that in you or you wouldn't be asking this question. Unfortunately, you have to do almost all of this on your own....so be strong.
Disregard the emotional attacks from his family, friends, and him - and KNOW that those will pass with time - I swear they will. Take comfort in people you trust 100% - and even those people may change as you go through this process. Listen to your heart. Sounds like it's saying ';go, girl.';
Trust me, I've been there.
You can get a divorce without his consent. However, are you sure you really want a divorce? That is all up to you. Maybe you are just very angry right now... Give it more thought.
Also, even if his family has Schizophrenia, that does not mean anything! Atleast to me it means nothing, so they are all crazy. Now if you would have said he is he schizophrenic, which would be a different story.
Damage goods comment was him saying ';oh my god, don鈥檛 leave me I will be the messed up one.'; People tend to express how they feel or will feel on to others, to get it off their chest.
Consider if what he ';does to you'; is really on purpose or as bad as you are believing it to be, or is it you exaggerating.
On a lighter tone, you married a man that cries? Ha-ha, that should have been a clue to not marry -- Just kidding.
You should actually consider if this man makes you feel good 80% of the time you are with him, or if he makes you feel miserable. I say 80% because it is impossible to avoid conflicts between peoples. If you do feel he is just messing your happiness up, then divorce might be the solution.
Sounds complicated. But yes, you can still get a divorce. Talk to a lawyer. Damaged goods? Please. No you will not be damaged goods. You're right, he is controlling. Manipulative too.
Yes you can still get a divorce if he isn't wanting it. It will take alittle longer and you will need to be stronger and not let his cry baby attitude suck up back and stop the divorce process.
And think about this you being damaged goods is his fault you are damaged because of him and his problems. But you are not damaged because of it.
it will take longer but yes you can
good luck
going through the same thing
well if your not comfortable with the way he acts somtimes, then you need to confront him. Tell him how you think he can be a bit controlling, and that you think you two should make decisions together, seeing how your married now. If you married the guy, then there has to be somthing there, I wouldn't get a divorce just yet, talk to him first, and let him know how serious you are about your relationship together. And if a man comes back crying, then you know he has somes serious feelings for you. give him another chance. You don't want to make a choice about a divorce, you havn't gave him time yet, just talk to him.
what state?
All the 50 states have different rules so it is important that you see what it will take you get you divorced.
Look in your phone book or on line and try to see what attorneys will offer you a free consultation to get an idea of what you have in store
but to answer your question, YES you can be divorced without his help but it will be a tad more difficult.
P.s. If you are such damaged goods, why does he keep coming back (maybe to do more damage to you?)
Of course you can get a divorce. He doesn't have to consent. First, move very far away from this guy. Don't let him know where you are, and don't be in any hurry to hook up with another guy.
Work on yourself first so you don't repeat this pattern.
You should have never married him in the first place BUT having said that, you can divorce him. He is playing you for a fool since you already know you have trouble with him crying. Damaged goods???? Then that is 90% of the population since most of us out here are divorced and I don't think you could find 1% of the people older than 21 that are still virgins anyway. Who cares? Damaged goods is an old saying when the culture said you were supposed to marry a virgin. You can't even find one hardly anymore. That is were society has fallen to. Don't worry about it. There are plenty of guys out there that will treat you right. Ditch this loser quickly!!!
Sure, anyone can. It's sad, but divorce is common and very easy to obtain in this day and age we live in.
Need legal advice for divorce / custody case?
State of Colorado, divorce has been going on for almost 6 months. Opposing council is unethical, and has pulled out every dirty trick possible. He is attempting to over-turn protection order in place, and constantly creates frivolous issues for my attorney to drain my retainer. Nearly $40k dollars later, I am realizing my attorney is not a match for this- he is always playing defensive and gets mauled by opposing council.
I need a new attorney but now do not have the money for a retainer. Because my spouse has unlimited finances, I have been told I won't qualify for legal aid, and have been advised by many that legal aid/pro bono attorneys often do not put in the effort necessary to win a case.
I am desperate. My ex, even with his domestic abuse history, has been awarded more custody than me of our 2 year old son and while the judge reminded me this is only temporary, I have no idea where to turn.Need legal advice for divorce / custody case?
I think the main problem is that not everything needs to be responded to, and I cannot even imagine what took $40K in 6 months.
I have seen many divorce cases where one spouse was ordered to pay for the legal expenses for both spouses....I would also go to court alone the next time (you can always appeal) and simpy explain to the judge that you cannot qualify for legal aid (but you still need to go, they cannot refuse you based on your SPOUSE'S income in a divorce case b/c you cannot force him to pay your expenses), and can no longer pay for an attorney.
If he has a domestic abuse history, there has to be a reason why he was awarded more visitation time...it isn't b/c your soon-to-be-ex has more money, judges ALWAYS state a reason for it...you should have posted that reason here.
I wouldn't worry about the protection order unless this man has actually tried to kill you...you didn't post that he has actually ever hit you, as domestic abuse is in many forms.
Keep in mind that draining money to keep a protection order in place is a waste of money....someone that is ACTUALLY truly trying to do you harm...is going to ignore the order anyway, and if he has THAT much money, chances are very slim that he would risk losing everything he has paid for, in order to end up in prison.
Focus on your CHILD.Need legal advice for divorce / custody case?
You address several issues. First, the above response is fantastic!! But I wanted to add to a couple of issues. You indicate that you feel your opposing counsel is unethical. Before you make a statement like that, hopefully you have clear evidence to the fact. You may want to contact the ABA and post a complaint. (Here is a link to their website, for Colorado http://www.abanet.org/legalservices/find鈥?/a>
There are other resources here. IF you don't feel your attorney is good, and you truly have a case (keep your feelings out of it -- are you a good parent, responsive, understanding, etc. and can you prove it?) you should be able to find an attorney who will take it on. Most attorneys will give you some time to talk with them before taking a retainer (initial consultations are frequently, but not always, free) so you should be able to shop around.
Also, see if you can research the opposing counsel. See if you can find who has won cases against them in the past - they are more likely to win in the future.
Good luck on your search.
I need a new attorney but now do not have the money for a retainer. Because my spouse has unlimited finances, I have been told I won't qualify for legal aid, and have been advised by many that legal aid/pro bono attorneys often do not put in the effort necessary to win a case.
I am desperate. My ex, even with his domestic abuse history, has been awarded more custody than me of our 2 year old son and while the judge reminded me this is only temporary, I have no idea where to turn.Need legal advice for divorce / custody case?
I think the main problem is that not everything needs to be responded to, and I cannot even imagine what took $40K in 6 months.
I have seen many divorce cases where one spouse was ordered to pay for the legal expenses for both spouses....I would also go to court alone the next time (you can always appeal) and simpy explain to the judge that you cannot qualify for legal aid (but you still need to go, they cannot refuse you based on your SPOUSE'S income in a divorce case b/c you cannot force him to pay your expenses), and can no longer pay for an attorney.
If he has a domestic abuse history, there has to be a reason why he was awarded more visitation time...it isn't b/c your soon-to-be-ex has more money, judges ALWAYS state a reason for it...you should have posted that reason here.
I wouldn't worry about the protection order unless this man has actually tried to kill you...you didn't post that he has actually ever hit you, as domestic abuse is in many forms.
Keep in mind that draining money to keep a protection order in place is a waste of money....someone that is ACTUALLY truly trying to do you harm...is going to ignore the order anyway, and if he has THAT much money, chances are very slim that he would risk losing everything he has paid for, in order to end up in prison.
Focus on your CHILD.Need legal advice for divorce / custody case?
You address several issues. First, the above response is fantastic!! But I wanted to add to a couple of issues. You indicate that you feel your opposing counsel is unethical. Before you make a statement like that, hopefully you have clear evidence to the fact. You may want to contact the ABA and post a complaint. (Here is a link to their website, for Colorado http://www.abanet.org/legalservices/find鈥?/a>
There are other resources here. IF you don't feel your attorney is good, and you truly have a case (keep your feelings out of it -- are you a good parent, responsive, understanding, etc. and can you prove it?) you should be able to find an attorney who will take it on. Most attorneys will give you some time to talk with them before taking a retainer (initial consultations are frequently, but not always, free) so you should be able to shop around.
Also, see if you can research the opposing counsel. See if you can find who has won cases against them in the past - they are more likely to win in the future.
Good luck on your search.
I need advice about divorce.?
My husband and I have been married nearly 13 yrs. He has been spending alot of time with my brother who is addicted to drugs. I know my husband has been lightly using as well. We constantly argue about him hanging around my brother because I don't trust him. But yet he disrespects me and goes anyway. He was fired from his last job because he couldn't pass a random drug test but yet he still expects me to trust him. After all the fighting i've finally gotten to where I don't care. I can't even smile around him, he makes me angry. So should I trust him and let it go or ask for a divorce?I need advice about divorce.?
There is no such thing as 'lightly using' drugs. You are either a user, or you are not a user. If your husband lies to you, sneaks around with your untrustworthy brother, and can't hold a job... it doesn't bode well. He has shown you clearly that he can't be trusted... yet he expects it of you.
As I see it, you have 2 choices. You can try to get him to turn his life around... and stick by him... and hope it all works out...
OR
You can walk. Try a separation at first... some counselling... either for both of you or just you... and see where it leads.
If I was in your situation, I would do what I could before I took the 'divorce' route. Divorce should be the last option.I need advice about divorce.?
Trust him and let it go. If he's only using recreationally it's akin to drinking a couple beers after work. Just because somebody made it illegal doesn't mean you should revolve your life around it.
Try and talk it out. Generally there should be an ultimatum like, you need to stop doing drugs or seek help, if not I am leaving and there's no turning back. Don't fall back on your promise.
You should ask him if he thinks he has a problem and if he is willing to get treatment
He's hooked on drugs. it has already cost him his job. Leave him.
If he makes you so sad- leave him and move on!
Life is too short.
Tell him outright that he has a choice to make in life. Drugs and your brother, or you and a family. Let him make the decision. If he say's you, as oppossed to your brother, lay down the law. Tell him you will give him random drug test's from the pharmacy whenever you feel like it for the next year at a minimum, and that if he fails one, he is out the door. When you tell him that, watch his reaction. It will tell you how serious he is about being with you.
Honestly, I would just send him down the road!! Addictions are good grounds for divorce.
He has shown you that he isn't trustworthy, and it is his responsiblility to prove that he can be.
There is no such thing as 'lightly using' drugs. You are either a user, or you are not a user. If your husband lies to you, sneaks around with your untrustworthy brother, and can't hold a job... it doesn't bode well. He has shown you clearly that he can't be trusted... yet he expects it of you.
As I see it, you have 2 choices. You can try to get him to turn his life around... and stick by him... and hope it all works out...
OR
You can walk. Try a separation at first... some counselling... either for both of you or just you... and see where it leads.
If I was in your situation, I would do what I could before I took the 'divorce' route. Divorce should be the last option.I need advice about divorce.?
Trust him and let it go. If he's only using recreationally it's akin to drinking a couple beers after work. Just because somebody made it illegal doesn't mean you should revolve your life around it.
Try and talk it out. Generally there should be an ultimatum like, you need to stop doing drugs or seek help, if not I am leaving and there's no turning back. Don't fall back on your promise.
You should ask him if he thinks he has a problem and if he is willing to get treatment
He's hooked on drugs. it has already cost him his job. Leave him.
If he makes you so sad- leave him and move on!
Life is too short.
Tell him outright that he has a choice to make in life. Drugs and your brother, or you and a family. Let him make the decision. If he say's you, as oppossed to your brother, lay down the law. Tell him you will give him random drug test's from the pharmacy whenever you feel like it for the next year at a minimum, and that if he fails one, he is out the door. When you tell him that, watch his reaction. It will tell you how serious he is about being with you.
Honestly, I would just send him down the road!! Addictions are good grounds for divorce.
He has shown you that he isn't trustworthy, and it is his responsiblility to prove that he can be.
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