Need some advice on how to cope with divorce....?

I was married to for 9 yrs, filed for divorce in March and I now I feel like a failure. I know what went wrong in the marriage and working things out is not an option because I've tried all I can for the past 9 yrs and we still fight about the same problems. I just don't know what to do....Please give me some advice on how you dealt with your divorce. I have great family support, but what happens now...Need some advice on how to cope with divorce....?
The 2 of you just weren't meant to be. Move on and enjoy life, don't dwell on the past.Need some advice on how to cope with divorce....?
Same here I hung out for three kids and 13 years. If you know you have given all you could to your marriage than congrats and move on. Failure is other peoples beliefs being pushed on you, you wouldn't have let if you felt it was failure.don't know if you have any children but if you do just focus on them for a while and give yourself a weekly retreat. a pedicure is nice but if you only have 5 minutes a cup of tea. stay strong move on every morning remind yourself of the benefits of your new life. every evening be thankful you have it.
I recently went through a divorce and it is hard and heart breaking. It is something that you thought would last forever and is now ending. Take it one day at a time. It does get easier and with time you will be better again. Some say date and have fun, but I say take your time and don't rush things. Time is the best way to heal. If you have children then concentrate on them and yourself. If you don't concentrate on yourself and be good to you for a while. Good Luck to you!
Start getting to know yourself. Find things that you enjoy, that make you happy. Try to see the positive in everything that you do. You can't let negative thoughts rule your emotions. The best thing that you can do is wake up every morning and let everything in your past go. Thoughts will come in that will try to make you feel that you made a mistake and feel ba about what you have done, but be strong and just know in your heart that you did the best thing for yourself and that it was out of your control.
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Hon, I was married for 24 years! He left me for someone else... I felt like a real failure until a friend pointed out that I did ALL the trying and he did none.





He was an asshole, and my life got happier by stages after he left.


I am now remarried, to the man I was meant to be with...we just had to find each other, %26amp; I had to have my kids because he's sterile.





Now, you take one day at a time. You be the best YOU that you can be, and you will find your true love eventually.





Good luck %26amp; God bless. There IS love after divorce!
U first have to decide firmly for divorce and seek a good lawyer but ofcourse u can do it urself if u follow the link below and study all the issues of divorce


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Well you could have hung in there and been miserable and considered yourself a success. That wouldn't be good. It's always disappointing to get divorced. I think everyone feels this way.





Now you have the chance to get on with your life. Who knows what could happen? It can be exciting!!!!
take each day as a new beginning. read, listen to music take a walk and just relax a little. you move forward and don't look back. you have nothing to be ashamed of it just wasn't going to work for you
It's all about perception. You filed for divorce because you could see it wasnt working and nothing could be done to fix it - therefore, actually having the divorce finalised does not make you a failure. It is the first step for the rest of your life from this point forward. Of course it will be hard for some time, but that all passes. In the beginning you might have to consciously make an effort to leave the house and catch up with friends and family - but after a little while it wont feel like an effort. You'll start noticing all the little things that make you happy again - like not having to arrange your schedule around another person, not having to cook or clean for someone else, sleeping in if you feel like it, staying out late if you feel like it. Start looking after yourself again - take time out to exercise (even just walking in the fresh air at sunset), do a short course or hobby, spring clean your house, have a bath with candles and bubbles - anything really, as long as it makes you feel relaxed and content. Get your social life active again too - nothing will get you on your feet again quicker than the support of friends and family :) If you are feeling really down and don't feel like you are coping, dont be afraid to contact someone for help either - you might just need to get it off your chest to help realise that you are not a failure.
Enjoy, You should be happy. You filed and you got what you wanted. I'm becoming a believer in people actually having to take marriage classes before being able to get a marriage licence. Same goes for having children.





People should have to prove %26amp; earn the honor of marriage. Same should go for the privilege of having kids.





Feminism


Ego,


Lack of correct communication skills.


Problem solving skills


lack of values %26amp; morals


Learning to actually forgive


Lack of role models growing up. Their mother's filed too.





Some of the main players above that lead to the downfall. People go in to marriage blind %26amp; have no clue how to handle all the situation that come up. Most couple are their own worst enemies.





Maybe, if people had to take marriage class they might learn some things about their partner that would open their eyes or maybe they would gain skills they lack.





Who knows, investing some cash in some form of education to navigate marriage before hand, wouldn't land up in the hands of divorce lawyers.





**** The advice on here is Feminist garbage. Like Keep busy 24/7, do fun things. Celebrate you busted up your family. Don't look back.





One day your actually going to have to deal with your feelings and face them, work through them, confront them and actually get comfortable with the pain.





Otherwise you just turn into another of the many headcase women running around going into another relationship with a ton of baggage you never dealt with and you go and screw some other guys life up.