Ok I have been with my husband 6 years married 4. We have a 4 year old daughter. He is in the military and we are stationed in Georgia. We got in a fight and I left. The next day I went home to see what was gonna happen and he had shoved all my stuff, even pictures of me and my christmas stocking in the closet. He told me that he was happy and didn't want me to come home and wanted a divorce, but I could keep my car and cell phone and he would pay for it until I get a job. He even let me keep the debit card for whatever me and my daughter need. He let me get what I wanted from our house. We are not fighting about anything and are being very civil and mutual on everything. He said I could keep our child and I will let him see her every weekend when he is off and he has offered to pay child support and alimony. Well that all sounds great, but I am concerned about some things. He is already paying for websites where you meet woman and today when I took him our daughter he didn't even have anything to do with her. He only said like 3 words to her and just continued playing his video game and he didn't want to keep her because he had plans to drink with his co-worker. This is crappy to me. We were only there 2 hours and he wanted us to leave. I don't know what to do. He said he was going to file the divorce and we would just be mutual on everything which is what I want but he don't act like he even wants his daughter. I think he just wants us out of his life so he can party and have fun. Just extra info, I am 23 he is 22. We got pregnant when i was 18. If you have been thru this help me. What do you think I should do? ThanksI need some divorce advice! Thanks?
My husband and I went through something like this right after the birth of our daughter. (before marriage) I think its really important for people to be able to ';spread their wings';. Usually they do this before getting married and having children. To me it sounds like he's just wanting to see what else is out there because he doesn't know anything but you for the last 6 years. It hurts alot but its better being able to move on without cheating being done behind your back. Keep your head up and focus on your baby, everything will work itself out in time!I need some divorce advice! Thanks?
you need to find a good divorce lawyer. You need to get your divorce, alimony, child support, etc set up thru a lawyer. He is already ignorning his daughter, do you really think he will go thru with everything else? for you daughter's sake, do things the right way and get a lawyer to protect her.
There is bad he does not love you or your daughter. There is good he wants a divorce in the civil manner. Take a lawyer and look for the best future for your kid as YOU may provide for her. You will have a lot what you can do for her. You lucky that you have a wonderful daughter. Good luck!
Give him what he wants (a divorce) before he closes the bank account for you and dosen't make your payments as promised. Right now he is seeing freedom - but that will change.
He'll grow up. His loss your gain. Move on without him.
you cant make a man want his daughter.
but he seems to be reasonable so i recomend talking about it... just tell him, i think you need to spend time with our daughter, she seems to be missing her daddy, and she rarely gets to see you...
and if you can throw something in there about him beign a good daddy....
guys are easy if you stroke thier egos and give them compliments.
I think you should see a divorce lawyer. Everything should be legally spelled out as far as all the mutually agreed on things you mentioned go - because he can decide to be in a bad mood and not do any of the things he promised. He's being kind of childish and may not even want a divorce. But he's pushed it this far and so have you. So at the very least make your break up legal. Your daughter deserves legal protections and benefits that come with divorce.
He may be drinking alone and a lot. He may be meeting women for sex. He may be doing a lot of things you don't know about. If the communication between you two isn't good, there's not much he is going to be telling you anyway.
You should be looking for and getting a job, moving on with the divorce proceedings and trying to keep everything civil between the two of you, for your daughter's sake. You should file for divorce because waiting for him to do that puts all the control on his side of the transactions. You need to have legal counsel (a lawyer) so that your rights are protected.
Sounds like he's done and trying to move on. Try to get along with him for the sake of your daughter, but know that he might try to work things out with you if he doesn't find what he's looking for right away. It sounds like he was pretty selfish while you were visiting him. Try to visit with him outside of the house where he won't have a computer distracting him. I would also not be available while they are visiting. That way he has to take care of and spend time with his daughter. If you are there to do it for him he is going to take adavantage of that.
My first husband had nothing to do with our son until a few years after we divorced. He would take him when he was supposed to have him for the weekend, but his family or a babysitter would end up watching him. It frustrated me, but it wasn't any of my business. It was their issue to work out. In the long run I ended up with a beautiful adult child that has a great deal more respect for me than he does for his dad. They talk, and he'll visit him, but they don't have anywhere near the bond that we do. I would have loved for them to be close too, but he chose his relationship with his son. I couldn't force it.
Good luck to you!
yes i was in a similar situation with my childs father we had a baby at a very young age i was 15 and he was 16. im 21 now and he is 23. anyways he stopped showing love towards us and started hanging out with his friends more. he gave me that ';i could care less'; attitude and left me alone with the baby while he partied and chilled with his friends. I learned that he was cheating on me too. I was hurt but then i realized he had to grow up fast and never had the chance to have fun. your husband is prolly trying to get this out of his system but he is going about it the wrong way. he wants to leave you so he can have fun and thats stupid because i promise you when he gets bored with partying and other females he is going to look for you and want you back. but this time it will be up to you to take him back. my ex begged me to take him back after all he did to me and i never did. be strong dont worry he is going to wake up
The dating sites are a gimme- He didn't say he doesn't want a wife. He said he doesn't want YOU as a wife.(can't blame him much there) Sometimes a child can be representative to a bad marriage for some people. That would explain the excessive video gaming and the lack of interest in the kid. In that regards he should hit the Army up for counseling because they are doing what they can to keep our soldiers mentally sound nowdays. He should take advantage of that.
This happens for than you may think. Married and had children to early. With the fact he is in the military just kinda masked the problem. just get a lawyer and part. Something may be going on with him in service that may have him frighten. Like he may be called up and you will cheat on him while he is gone . If he has changed his behavior lately you need to find out what caused it . You might even need to talk to his Commander or close friends. There may be more going on that brought this own. It may not have anything to do with you or his daughter . This may be his way of distancing himself so later will be less painful.
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